What God made me realize. :)

Loser....not.

So today, October 1, 2010 Friday, was supposed to be the day for our recollection. I woke up like 5 in the morning to prepare and then head to school afterwards. To my surprise I was running late (which is not surprising actually,). I woke up really early for the first time this semester and yet I'm still running late. I won't blame traffic jam (tho it's one of the reasons why I am late), instead I'll blame myself. Like what my status on my Facebook account, I really feel like I'll be sick. Since yesterday, I was caught in the rain with no umbrella, and I have to ran really fast while my laptop was with me to be able to catch my class. I made it, but my hair kept on dripping. I'm soaked up from the rain. Add up the stress I have because of too much paper works. See. Now who won't think I'll be sick.

I woke up, not realizing I've got a stiffed neck from sleeping. I noticed it when I was about to go home from school after I've rescheduled my recollection. When I was still on my way and my classmates kept on texting and calling me, asking where I am and I am late, plus the bus is about to go off to the venue. I was cursing this day, saying shit, expressing how much pissed I am earlier. Who wouldn't feel bad about it, right? You woke up really early (like the first in this sem), prepared things which you'll use for the recollection, borrowed Mom's special digital camera. Like, I'm all dressed up, put some make up on because I'm feeling good about our recollection, then all of a sudden, I am standing there outside the gates of the university, waiting for the school bus to come and let me in, which eventually did not. I was left alone by the buses which are heading straight to the venue for the recollection.

A classmate told me to head to the chapel and see if the other bus is still there (there's a bus there waiting, it's for the late comers accordingly), so stupid me were in a hurry, almost running just to make it to the last bus. While on my way back, (because I immediately took a ride home after I saw the bus for our block left), I was praying really hard to God to please make a miracle and allow me to attend the recollection for our block. For 15 minutes, I was praying. Praying really hard. Begging God to let me attend the recollection. When I got into the venue, nothing's there. There are 2 buses but they were not the ones heading for the venue of our recollection. I went to the chapel, saw nothing. No one. I asked the keeper of the chapel on who can I ask regarding our recollection, and instructed me to go up stairs and head to the office. He told me, "Siguro, apat kayong hindi nakaabot sa reco." I came across a middle-aged man in a blue uniform (so I thought he is a member of the faculty because of the uniform he is wearing). He told me that I should go back on the third week of the next semester for a special recollection and pay the fee. I agreed, and went out.

I left the chapel, smiling. yes, I still managed to smile even though what I just experienced is something which somebody cannot smile about. I was just silent. My Zune is not playing a loud or hip song. I was walking slow. Relaxed, as I am. I was catching my breath too, for I was running just a few minutes ago. As I was about to cross the road, the rain started pouring down. Once again, rain touched my skin. I've got an umbrella with me, but I chose not to use it. I was caught in the rain for the second time. But I didn't mind it. I patiently waited for a jeepney. I need to go home, I said to myself.

On the jeepney, I was smiling. Thinking about how things had happened. Thinking about positive things. it was just okay for me that I was not able to attend the recollection. Because I know, God has better plans. I asked, but he did not give it. It's either because it's not the right time for me for a recollection, or He has better plans. I trust in Him, so I accepted things wholeheartedly. I was indeed feeling great. Maybe, God gave me peace of mind. A while ago, I was so pissed, almost in anger, cursing every thing that came across my mind. But suddenly, those were gone. Thanks to Him. What happened to me this morning was really annoying, but positive in a way that it is a blessing in disguise. I was calling myself a loser for not being able to attend the recollection. For being left out by my blockmates. But I realized, I shouldn't call myself a loser just for the reason of not being able to attend a recollection. That's way too small. I am a winner, I know. I did not lose. There will always be a new schedule for a recollection, and I can take it. I did not lose. I won. I won a lot of time for myself to relax, chill, sleep at home. I'm thanking God for what He had done to me. I know, He has great plans for me this day. it's just a recollection though. No big deal. What's important is that I learned a lesson.

God always has better plans. Ask, and it shall be given unto you. If not, it's because of two reasons--it's not for you now, or He has better plans for you. God will always give the best for the best. We, His children are the best for Him. Thank You Lord, for lighting up my mind, my heart, and this day. You never fail me indeed. Thank You Lord. I love You. :)

No comments :

Post a Comment

Without using your Facebook account